Enlarge this image In , user data on OkCupid showed that most men on the site rated black women as less attractive than women of other races and ethnicities. That resonated with Ari Curtis, 28, and inspired her blog, Least Desirable. I usually like "bears," but no "panda bears. He has since deleted the messages and apps. How Online Dating Shapes Our Relationships Jason is earning his doctorate with a goal of helping people with mental health needs.
NPR is not using his last name to protect his privacy and that of the clients he works with in his internship. He is gay and Filipino and says he felt like he had no choice but to deal with the rejections based on his ethnicity as he pursued a relationship.
But I started to think, I have a choice: Would I rather be alone, or should I, like, face racism? So he wasn't surprised when he read a blog post from OkCupid co-founder Christian Rudder in about race and attraction. Rudder wrote that user data showed that most men on the site rated black women as less attractive than women of other races and ethnicities.
Similarly, Asian men fell at the bottom of the preference list for most women. While the data focused on straight users, Jason says he could relate. After drinks at a Brooklyn bar, one of her more recent OkCupid matches, a white Jewish man, offered this: Other dating experts have pointed to such stereotypes and lack of multiracial representation in the media as part of the likely reason that plenty of online daters have had discouraging experiences based on their race.
Melissa Hobley, OkCupid's chief marketing officer, says the site has learned from social scientists about other reasons that people's dating preferences come off as racist, including the fact that they often reflect IRL — in real life — norms.
And in a segregated society, that can be harder in certain areas than in others. After growing up in the mostly white town of Fort Collins, Colo. If racism weren't so ingrained in our culture, would they have those preferences? She also points to a recent study by international researchers that found that a rise in interracial marriages in the U. For now, her strategy is to keep a casual attitude about her romantic life. Jason is out of the dating game entirely because he ended up finding his current partner, who is white, on an app two years ago.
He credits part of his success with making bold statements about his values in his profile.