This conversation helped them land a movie deal as well. I read this book in when I started my dating adventures after my divorce. I really enjoyed it, but something did not quite fit for me. It is obvious that Greg truly cares about women. For some women, that is enough to stop being treated poorly by the men in their lives.
For me, what was glaringly obvious was that he was tired of women being treated poorly because of their own illusions about romance. He was trying to save us tons of heartache by making us understand that most of the time, we are the rule, not the exception. His suggestions eliminate a lot of men out there. My dating adventures would have been over before they started, and my career as a dating and romance coach was unlikely to be born.
I had become the exception, and now I teach women to do the same. Greg was teaching women to have better boundaries, which are absolutely necessary when dating. For a nice dating experience, this is the best place to start. Still, I am not seeking out women who want just a nice dating experience.
I want women to learn that they can be adored for the rest of their lives and know that they can almost always be the exception. To do this, you will need much more than just better boundaries. You have to be willing to enjoy the adventure and quit choke-holding the destination. Dating is a magical journey, and a few things must happen for you to fully harness the experience. Number one is that you have to make up your mind to enjoy the ride.
If you decide to open yourself up to the possibilities, then we can work with you. Being a man-hater severely impairs your ability to be the exception, because you, by default, are setting up every man in your world to fail with you. Likewise, if you believe that the pool of men in your age group is insanely limited, I am here to remind you that people these days are moving in and out of relationships at all times and all ages.
So that means there are tons of options available. Also, I am gong to let you in on another secret: The adored woman learns how to inspire all types of men to treat her well. Oh, I remember the days… going out on a few dates and then impatiently wondering when were we going to officially be an item.
I made sure I looked like perfect girlfriend material scary note: I had no idea what a perfect girlfriend was. Then I would obsess some more, and almost every single time, he ended up with someone else.
It simply means that tunnel vision is not sexy or attractive. It also very rarely helps you to be the exception except with men that are unstable themselves. If you are not the exception, consider it your universal protection. If you want to have your way with men, you must, must, must open yourself up to the possibilities. A truly adored woman understands that she will have what she wants and trusts the process.
Men really would like the opportunity to make you happy. You are so much fun to be around when you are happy. You are intoxicatingly delicious when you are happy.
So why not learn to ask for what you want from the beginning? Remember, you are on an adventure, too, and he would like to be included. Especially when they include men along for the ride. If you come upon a male drought after you start your dating adventures, it means you need to stop putting all your energy on men and start upping your level of self care and fun.
Holy Moly, Jenn, it super sux when you have tons of fantastic male attention, and then nothing. Well… actually, from my personal experience, I always found that my male droughts coincided with being too caught up in men and not enough of me time. So yes, it is a SIGN, that you should take a personal assessment of your life.
Are you taking great care of yourself physically and spiritually, spending time with your gals, with your family, with your job… etc and so forth… or are you neglecting one or more of these things? Find the area you are neglecting and tweak a bit. After you tweak, make sure you are not doing the tunnel vision routine, and then scout out a new delicious man to flirt with. When you open up your options for dating, you increase exception visibility.
Okay, I am going to say something that will probably piss a few people off. Men like their women how they like their high dollar toys: This is why, while dating, seeing more than one man until you have exclusivity is so important. I am NOT talking about telling him about the other men you are seeing. I am also NOT talking about intentionally trying to make him jealous or think that you are sleeping with other men.
I am talking about having genuine options in men and genuine options about who you choose to be exclusive with. You only have genuine options when you date more than one man that you have a genuine interest in getting to know better. Jeez, that was a whole lotta genuine!
The more true options you have increases his ability to see you as an exception instead of the rule. The Exception always has her own rules. The unforgettable women always plays by her own rules without being a nagging bitch. This means you always require him to honor your boundaries and still have a great time, too.
Sex happens only when you are ready. You get the idea. With the exception of a few unforgivable behaviors i. Also, a lot of male behaviors are not really all that bad, especially when you have a very full and exciting life of your own.
I encourage all of you to use this phrase when you encounter these behaviors: It all comes down to a choice. Do you want to be the exception or the rule? I got tired of being the rule, so I chose to be the exception by using the strategies I outlined for you. So few women actually choose to be the exception that the choice in itself already makes them exceptional. If you like this article, I would be tickled giddy if you shared with your girls on Facebook, Twitter, Google Plus, etc.