Dating but moving away. Should I Stop Dating Until I Move to a New City?.



Dating but moving away

Dating but moving away

Would you consider starting a relationship with someone who was potentially moving in 2 months? I posted on here a few months ago about a guy who ended up being nuts. I slept with him too soon, he told me he loved me after a week. It was a mess. Right after that ended I met this new guy unexpectedly. He and I hit it off, have been seeing each other times per week for 6 weeks now. Have NOT slept together, taking it slow. We both really like each other and have established this.

Last night we got into a deep conversation where he admitted that right before he met me he had applied for a company transfer to their Florida location we're in NY.

He told me he didn't know what to do because he didn't expect this to happen between us. He should know if he got the transfer by this Friday, and if he did he would be moving in October.

He was planning on waiting until after he found out to tell me because he didn't want to have to bring it up if it wasn't going to happen, but I guess it was just eating away at him keeping it in.

Obviously I'm going to wait and see if he got his transfer, but honestly I don't see why he wouldn't. He's a great employee and has been with them for a few years now. I'm torn about how to handle this from there. He's a really sincere guy and said that he felt like total crap about it and wouldn't blame me if I wanted nothing to do with him after he said that.

But that's not how I operate really. My instinct would be to see where it goes over the next two months and see where we're at when it comes to be time for him to move. I know that 3 and a half months of dating isn't a long time and it might be difficult to establish something meaningful in that length of time, but we both expressed that we haven't felt this way about someone in some time. The other thing is I just moved to my current city in May, and I only have a required 9 more months here.

So reasonably if we did work out we could do 6 months long distance or something, but I feel kinda crazy even thinking about that since this whole thing is just starting still. But my point is that with my job it's not unreasonable at all for me to move to Florida when I'm done with my commitment here. Is my thinking just totally off base here? I know it would be EASIER to just end things now, but what good does it do me to always play it safe and never take risks in life?

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Dating but moving away

Would you consider starting a relationship with someone who was potentially moving in 2 months? I posted on here a few months ago about a guy who ended up being nuts. I slept with him too soon, he told me he loved me after a week. It was a mess. Right after that ended I met this new guy unexpectedly. He and I hit it off, have been seeing each other times per week for 6 weeks now. Have NOT slept together, taking it slow. We both really like each other and have established this. Last night we got into a deep conversation where he admitted that right before he met me he had applied for a company transfer to their Florida location we're in NY.

He told me he didn't know what to do because he didn't expect this to happen between us. He should know if he got the transfer by this Friday, and if he did he would be moving in October.

He was planning on waiting until after he found out to tell me because he didn't want to have to bring it up if it wasn't going to happen, but I guess it was just eating away at him keeping it in. Obviously I'm going to wait and see if he got his transfer, but honestly I don't see why he wouldn't.

He's a great employee and has been with them for a few years now. I'm torn about how to handle this from there. He's a really sincere guy and said that he felt like total crap about it and wouldn't blame me if I wanted nothing to do with him after he said that.

But that's not how I operate really. My instinct would be to see where it goes over the next two months and see where we're at when it comes to be time for him to move.

I know that 3 and a half months of dating isn't a long time and it might be difficult to establish something meaningful in that length of time, but we both expressed that we haven't felt this way about someone in some time. The other thing is I just moved to my current city in May, and I only have a required 9 more months here. So reasonably if we did work out we could do 6 months long distance or something, but I feel kinda crazy even thinking about that since this whole thing is just starting still.

But my point is that with my job it's not unreasonable at all for me to move to Florida when I'm done with my commitment here. Is my thinking just totally off base here? I know it would be EASIER to just end things now, but what good does it do me to always play it safe and never take risks in life?

Dating but moving away

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5 Comments

  1. Often promising relationships come with an expiration date. This situation is no exception to that. So, this is me swallowing all of my pride and admitting something to you:

  2. You could be extra motivated to enter a relationship because you want the comfort of knowing you have someone, no matter what.

  3. Still, here I am writing down my most transparent thoughts in hopes that I might leave less unsaid.

  4. Nonetheless, fear can be a large motivator when it comes time to make your decision about this person and your future together. All you know is that she lied. She stuck in LA and gave it a shot.

  5. For the first time in what felt like an eternity, I remembered what it felt like to appreciate the little things about someone.

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