Dating an older man 20 years. The Perks—and Challenges—of Dating a Much Older Man.



Dating an older man 20 years

Dating an older man 20 years

How did you guys meet? We knew each other for a year before we started dating. We met playing pick-up soccer. Now, I must mention that his son played in those games as well he was 12 years old at the time. You know, due to the child thing.

Was there an instant attraction? Initially, I just have to go back to that first reaction. Did you ever hear that story about when Columbus landed in the West Indies and the natives were not physically able to see the boats because nothing like that had ever entered their reality before?

Well, sort of like that. Have you dated men who were significantly older than you before? No, but I suppose I have been attracted to older men in the past. I was the girl with the crush on Harrison Ford while my friends all went crazy over whoever was in the latest teeny-boppers mag at the time, most likely Joey Lawrence. I also liked men in positions of authority, teachers and sports coaches if they were in their 20s or 30s. Not ALL of them mind you, but there was definitely an appeal.

Have your age differences created any problems? Well, not yet but we are approaching a time when our future will take more of a leading role in the decisions we make. For example, he will be retiring long before me.

Also, I still have a good 10 years of potential child-bearing in me, but we have yet to seriously think about going down that road. Has anyone hassled you about your age differences? No one has ever given us a hard time.

Neither of our families really cast a second glance well, in front of us anyway… who knows what they had to say amongst themselves when we left! If I was in my early 20s, I think my mother would have been worried.

Ah, I do like this question as there are so many benefits! Although, these may be due to the person I am dating rather than a function of his age. But anyway, for starters — 1 Chivalry! Thankfully, when I have a panic attack or a hissy-fit, I have someone to show me the bigger picture and level me out. Being with someone solid in his career, with a little more life experience and rationality has certainly brought me down to earth more than once.

I think having the courage to admit that the life-path you are on is not working and starting again is very inspiring. Being with a man who can talk about how he felt in a given situation and what he did to turn it around is not only impressive but consoling and helpful, even if my situation is not entirely the same.

Be it chores, time or the other dish that I wanted to taste at the restaurant we are at, I love to share. I think this is a skill many men develop with age. Anyway, we have absolutely no issues with sharing the workload or compromising on any issue. He learned the hard way and now that he has someone that fits perfectly, he shows me every day! In return, I show him the same respect and I find it really grows our love every day.

What are the challenges? Nothing really, other than some of the long-term things that are a challenge to any relationship. Saving for the future, whether or not to procreate… all these pink elephants transpire the age gap!

I think the real challenge is finding a place that accepts the two of you together. Right now we have that but who knows what a move would bring?

Any advice to ladies crushing on someone a bit older than them? If you feel that it could work and you think the sentiments are returned — go for it! Hopefully, you are comfortable enough in your own sense of moral and ethical values to be able to judge if the relationship is appropriate or not for example, I would imagine age can mess with a workplace romance or it could be difficult to date the father of a kid you teach.

However, as long as you are not taking on the role of a mistress or getting yourself involved in some other sticky situation, remember, you only live once and the best opportunities are not necessarily the most obvious ones.

Have you dated someone significantly younger or older than you? Relationships — Before you commit checklist Relationships don't have to be complicated. Figure it out, once and for all.

Sometimes it's as simple as a checklist. Now check your email to confirm your subscription. There was an error submitting your subscription. First Name Email Address We use this field to detect spam bots. If you fill this in, you will be marked as a spammer. I'd like to receive the free email course.

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DATING OLDER: MY 30 YR AGE GAP RELATIONSHIP (PROS & CONS)



Dating an older man 20 years

How did you guys meet? We knew each other for a year before we started dating. We met playing pick-up soccer. Now, I must mention that his son played in those games as well he was 12 years old at the time.

You know, due to the child thing. Was there an instant attraction? Initially, I just have to go back to that first reaction. Did you ever hear that story about when Columbus landed in the West Indies and the natives were not physically able to see the boats because nothing like that had ever entered their reality before? Well, sort of like that. Have you dated men who were significantly older than you before?

No, but I suppose I have been attracted to older men in the past. I was the girl with the crush on Harrison Ford while my friends all went crazy over whoever was in the latest teeny-boppers mag at the time, most likely Joey Lawrence. I also liked men in positions of authority, teachers and sports coaches if they were in their 20s or 30s. Not ALL of them mind you, but there was definitely an appeal.

Have your age differences created any problems? Well, not yet but we are approaching a time when our future will take more of a leading role in the decisions we make. For example, he will be retiring long before me. Also, I still have a good 10 years of potential child-bearing in me, but we have yet to seriously think about going down that road.

Has anyone hassled you about your age differences? No one has ever given us a hard time. Neither of our families really cast a second glance well, in front of us anyway… who knows what they had to say amongst themselves when we left! If I was in my early 20s, I think my mother would have been worried. Ah, I do like this question as there are so many benefits! Although, these may be due to the person I am dating rather than a function of his age.

But anyway, for starters — 1 Chivalry! Thankfully, when I have a panic attack or a hissy-fit, I have someone to show me the bigger picture and level me out. Being with someone solid in his career, with a little more life experience and rationality has certainly brought me down to earth more than once. I think having the courage to admit that the life-path you are on is not working and starting again is very inspiring.

Being with a man who can talk about how he felt in a given situation and what he did to turn it around is not only impressive but consoling and helpful, even if my situation is not entirely the same. Be it chores, time or the other dish that I wanted to taste at the restaurant we are at, I love to share.

I think this is a skill many men develop with age. Anyway, we have absolutely no issues with sharing the workload or compromising on any issue. He learned the hard way and now that he has someone that fits perfectly, he shows me every day! In return, I show him the same respect and I find it really grows our love every day.

What are the challenges? Nothing really, other than some of the long-term things that are a challenge to any relationship. Saving for the future, whether or not to procreate… all these pink elephants transpire the age gap! I think the real challenge is finding a place that accepts the two of you together. Right now we have that but who knows what a move would bring? Any advice to ladies crushing on someone a bit older than them?

If you feel that it could work and you think the sentiments are returned — go for it! Hopefully, you are comfortable enough in your own sense of moral and ethical values to be able to judge if the relationship is appropriate or not for example, I would imagine age can mess with a workplace romance or it could be difficult to date the father of a kid you teach. However, as long as you are not taking on the role of a mistress or getting yourself involved in some other sticky situation, remember, you only live once and the best opportunities are not necessarily the most obvious ones.

Have you dated someone significantly younger or older than you? Relationships — Before you commit checklist Relationships don't have to be complicated. Figure it out, once and for all. Sometimes it's as simple as a checklist. Now check your email to confirm your subscription. There was an error submitting your subscription. First Name Email Address We use this field to detect spam bots. If you fill this in, you will be marked as a spammer. I'd like to receive the free email course.

Dating an older man 20 years

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2 Comments

  1. While few would relish the thought of losing a partner, there are many examples of people leading successful and fulfilling lives after the death of one. Figure it out, once and for all. I worry you are looking for resilience outside of yourself.

  2. His emotional needs will differ from yours simply because he is in a different stage of life. When a decision is so vast, and with this many variables, the key is to shorten the focus.

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