By Miles Howard May 17, 6: People in recovery are vulnerable and open. And it probably goes without saying one should not attend AA meetings for the purpose of finding a soul mate — though rumor had it that at least two couples made it from this meeting to the altar. Having said that, the more I attended these meetings the more I realized that the only serious relationship I'd had in my 30s had been with alcohol.
I was single and fabulous, but was I ready to turn myself over to a higher power? Are you a veteran of L. We want to publish your story I'd spent years in New York writing a sex column for which nightly partying was fodder for my work; sex was an excuse to drink, and drinking was an excuse for sex.
As an addict, everything becomes a tangle of excuses and explanations, and so too became my motivation to stop drinking. The New York party scene, which had once dazzled me with its flashy clubs and seedy dive bars, had taken a cruel turn, feeling as far away as disco. So I made the exodus for Los Angeles with the vague hope that single and fabulous in Los Angeles would manifest as something else entirely. Affairs By Andrew Fryer Apr 12, I hooked up with a fashion designer who wore thick glasses, a keffiyeh scarf and whose fingers dripped with silver jewelry.
We spent four days together at his studio in the Arts District, where he asked to be my boyfriend. He took my measurements for a custom shift dress, and I thought that L. In under a week I had scored a new boyfriend and free couture.
In the sobering light of day, it was clearly some kind of hookup pad. Of course, I never heard from him again. After the designer ghosted me, there was the screenwriter. He wined and dined me from Santa Monica to Malibu, where we ate at trattorias I can't remember much about except that at one we were seated next to Aaron Paul and at another we were politely asked to leave because I was loudly going on about how I needed some of the screenwriter's Percocet left over from dental surgery.
Suffice to say, things didn't end well with the screenwriter. And to meet a man? In the meetings, I cried. I listened to men open up about their feelings. I started drinking less and less. I read the Big Book and started to think there was truth in the mantra, "It works if you work it.
I didn't find my soul mate at this trendy Venice AA meeting. But just as I'd picked up things about myself from encounters with other lovers, these meetings were ripe with information inventory, as they say about myself that I'd been starving for. The adages, mantras, and aspirational solution-oriented thinking spoke to me, and I listened. The process of sharing thoughts of my relationship with drinking formed a new self-care routine I'd been longing for.
Advertisement Sometimes you find that type of comfort and security from someone else caring for you. Sometimes you stumble upon it yourself. The author is an L.
Her website is www. Affairs chronicles the current dating scene in and around Los Angeles. If you have comments or a true story to tell, email us at LAAffairs latimes.